'URMILA': Exploring the Marginalized Woman in Indian Mythology
Indian Mythology is one of the richest elements of Indian Culture, which enriches it further and makes it a unique one in the world. Through generations, different stories in Indian mythology have been passed from centuries. The two great epics – the Ramayana and the Mahabharata speak highly of the ideal way of life. The Ramayana and The Mahabharata are not simply stories of heroism, but they embody the socio-religious ideals of millions of people of India. Now, when we think about The Ramayana, it invariably brings to our collective minds the characters of Ram, Sita, Lakshman, Hanuman, Ravana- even Kaikeyi and Manthara for that matter. We may think of Ram as an ideal king and a son, Lakshman as a devoted brother, probably sympathize with Sita and think of her as a devout wife but the character that we all miss and fail to think about is ‘Urmila’ also called as ‘the forgotten heroine of Ramayana’.
Now who was Urmila? Sita, although first, was the adopted daughter but Urmila was the first biological daughter of King Seeradhwaj or Janak, as he was called and Queen Sunaina of Mithila.
Urmila had three sisters- Sita who was the eldest, Mandavi who was of her age and Shrutakirti or Kirti who was the youngest. Mandavi and Kirti were their cousins from King Janak’s brother, King Khushadhwaj.
From her childhood itself, Urmila was not an ordinary child. She was never religiously inclined or visited temples like the rest of her sisters. She was extremely well versed in the Vedas and the Upanishads, politics, music, art and literature. She always yearned for more; she wanted to see more places, places she had heard about through her growing years. For her, marriage did not hold much interest but it was more like a social discipline she would have to conform to. She would rather seek knowledge instead of a suitor.
Urmila was only a year younger to Sita and was a foil to her right from the start. The two cradles had rocked in perfect harmony since childhood as smooth and strong as the bond that was to blossom between the two girls. Urmila was Sita’s lifeline and her soulmate. As their adopted daughter, King Janak and Queen Sunaina had fawned on Sita to the point of being slavish. Sita’s upbringing had not been normal; there was not a single instance when she had been scoffed or frowned upon. Urmila had suffered all of that and taken it with a brave smile on a trembling chin. Sita had been hailed as Janaki, Janak’s daughter, when it was Urmila who was his daughter and the sole proprietor of that name. Sita was Maithili, the princess of Mithila when it was Urmila who should have been crowned with that title. But Urmila was never resentful about all the favours showered upon Sita when at the same time, she was deprived of them. She treated Sita ‘normally’ like any other sister would. Praise was only reserved for Sita, though it was invariably Urmila who picked up the Vedic verses more quickly than her sisters. But not like Sita was proud of this or ever boasted about it. She, at the same time felt obligated to her, a burden which even she silently carried and could never shrug off. Urmila had always been the veritable older sister all through their growing years-strong, fiercely protective like a tigress, shielding Sita from everything, guiding her, helping her, consoling her.
Soon they all grew up and the time had come for Sita to get married. Ram, accompanied with Lakshman, had come to Mithila as a suitor for Sita’s Swayamvar where the challenge was to lift and string the famous ShivDhanush. And as we all know, Ram was successful in proving his physical prowess and winning Sita’s hand. While Sita knew that Ram was the one for her, Urmila got attracted to Lakshman at their first very sight. She found something cognate, a certain affinity as soon as she saw Lakshman and they were actually similar in many ways. She too realised that she desired for Lakshman as her companion. But her love was not unrequited. Lakshman had developed similar feelings for her. He was completely enchanted by her, just as her name suggests, Urmila- ‘the enchantress’. He loved her for her integrity, her knowledge, her passion for life and learning. In fact he was mesmerized by her to the point where he thought that he did not deserve her, and as I read, some of you might actually feel the same. But he had warned her before marrying saying that he cannot promise her happiness as he was too devoted to his brother, that he was servile to him. He doubted if he was worthy of her love and if he can give his whole to her. In spite of all these warnings, Urmila replied by telling him that, she did not want his surrender. She assured him that she would never come between his loyalty to his beloved brother and his family and she followed it. Eventually all the four sisters of Mithila got married to the four brothers of Ayodhya and everything seemed to be lovely for the initial two months.
Lakshman was always supportive of Urmila and showered her with love. Soon, as the myth tells us, Kaikeyi, King Dashrath’s second and his most beloved wife had put up a condition that Ram had to be exiled to the Dandakarna forest for fourteen years and her son was to be made the kind of Ayodhya as she was granted the two boons. Lakshman, without even giving a thought about Urmila, insisted Ram to take him along with him and in spite of Ram’s denial, he decided to go with him, so did Sita. Urmila was devasted. Not only she was going to be separated from the soulmate from her childhood, her sister but also that she would be parted for fourteen long, treacherous years from the man she loved the most. They had just started their married life. She even pleaded with Lakshman to take her along with them, but Lakshman had firmly refused saying that she would act as a distraction and that he would not be able to devote himself completely and protect his brother and his wife properly. Even though Urmila knew that Ram would be prioritised over her, she felt hurt that her husband did not even consider her or ask her before taking the decision. This was her fate, to be second. Second to everything from her childhood itself. Yet she took all of this in a positive way and supported her husband in his decision.
Lakshman made her believe that it was their love for each other that will keep them goingand that it was destined for him to go. It was surely devastating and painful for Ram, Sita and Lakshman to live in a forest like Dandakarna for fourteen years but even so, Urmila’s exile in the palace was way harder than theirs in the forest, an exile from attachment. All of us know how about Ram’s exile in the forest but hardly any of us know what happened in the palace at the very same time. Just two months after they left for their exile in the forest, King Dashrath passed away. It is said that the whole family had gone to the forest to convince Ram to come back to the palace but Ram denied as he had given his word to his father. Bharat, Ram’s third brother also took a vow that as long as Ram would be in the forest, he too, shall do his penance in Nandigram. Hearing this was like a scream for Urmila as she knew that her sister, Mandavi, who was married to Bharat would have to go through the same fate as hers.
At that point of time, in front of all the people she furiously argued that everyone talks about and follows the dharma of the father and the sons, of the king and the prince, of the Brahmin and the Kshatriya, even of the wife for her husband but she questioned the dharma of the husband for his wife, the dharma of the son for his mother. Was there no dharma for the sons and the husbands? Was it always about the father, sons and brothers? She stood up as woman when the family tradition there was to be silent when someone screams for justice. Her questions were nothing but valid but nobody could answer them. She ended up all by saying that they may be the best of princes, the perfect sons, the ideal brothers, probably the ideal king too, but never the good husband. Unfortunately, questioning all this was futile at that time as the woman was always unheard and her opinions hardly mattered. Bharat left for his penance anyway. They all got back home feeling rejected yet Urmila did not take their exile negatively.
She started working constructively by learning the Vedas and gaining knowledge. She always loved painting so she started making a painting of her wedding day. She also took up the responsibility to mend things between the queens in the palace. She showed everyone the bright side of the painful path and took immense care of everyone. She introduced the concept of family dinners so that everyone, at least once in a day, talks to each other and shares what they feel. Standing up like a pillar she held the palace together. It was she who looked after all the members in the family, keeping the family together and saving it from a living hell. She made the palace a better place to stay, making it home one wants to return to every single day; blessing it with her patient love, her indomitable spirit and her everlasting hope for peace.
Mandavi and Urmila were going through the same fate, living in the same wretchedness. Both of them had to stay apart from their husbands for such a long time but the same life was taken in two different ways by both of them. Mandavi had taken it bitterly and had started hating her husband for his decision when at the same time, Urmila’s love for Lakshman had only increased and she believed that it was also her husband’s love for her that kept her going. That she waited for the day for him to return. She lived on his memories. She guided Mandavi and told her to follow her interests. That we can only see the light when it is dark but if we are dark within, we can only see darkness around us. She told her to follow that light.
The fourth and the youngest brother, Shatrughna who was left in the palace had to go to various places for handling political affairs at times. Having no king, it was easy for any outsider to attack and take over Ayodhya as it was at its most vulnerable position. Urmila, who was well versed in politics took up the position and looked after state administration, giving orders which were followed too.
As she completed her painting, the nightmare was coming to an end. They were finally returning. Standing on the same steps where she had bid him adieu, she again held in her hands a gold tray for the aarti to welcome him home, her eyes steady. Lakshman looked at her and murmured that he had lived for her and that it was she who got him back home. The person who never got the love she actually deserved yet being never resentful about it; the peacemaker, patching up quarrels, diffusing tempers, ironing out the differences; who was entitled to everything but got nothing, yet never got malicious, braving it all her life, independently; never wasting tears of self-indulgent sorrow but letting it all out so beautifully through her fertile mind and generous heart, Urmila, is indeed the forgotten heroine of the Ramayana.
- Sanika Gad
Indian Mythology is one of the richest elements of Indian Culture, which enriches it further and makes it a unique one in the world. Through generations, different stories in Indian mythology have been passed from centuries. The two great epics – the Ramayana and the Mahabharata speak highly of the ideal way of life. The Ramayana and The Mahabharata are not simply stories of heroism, but they embody the socio-religious ideals of millions of people of India. Now, when we think about The Ramayana, it invariably brings to our collective minds the characters of Ram, Sita, Lakshman, Hanuman, Ravana- even Kaikeyi and Manthara for that matter. We may think of Ram as an ideal king and a son, Lakshman as a devoted brother, probably sympathize with Sita and think of her as a devout wife but the character that we all miss and fail to think about is ‘Urmila’ also called as ‘the forgotten heroine of Ramayana’.
Now who was Urmila? Sita, although first, was the adopted daughter but Urmila was the first biological daughter of King Seeradhwaj or Janak, as he was called and Queen Sunaina of Mithila.
Urmila had three sisters- Sita who was the eldest, Mandavi who was of her age and Shrutakirti or Kirti who was the youngest. Mandavi and Kirti were their cousins from King Janak’s brother, King Khushadhwaj.
From her childhood itself, Urmila was not an ordinary child. She was never religiously inclined or visited temples like the rest of her sisters. She was extremely well versed in the Vedas and the Upanishads, politics, music, art and literature. She always yearned for more; she wanted to see more places, places she had heard about through her growing years. For her, marriage did not hold much interest but it was more like a social discipline she would have to conform to. She would rather seek knowledge instead of a suitor.
Urmila was only a year younger to Sita and was a foil to her right from the start. The two cradles had rocked in perfect harmony since childhood as smooth and strong as the bond that was to blossom between the two girls. Urmila was Sita’s lifeline and her soulmate. As their adopted daughter, King Janak and Queen Sunaina had fawned on Sita to the point of being slavish. Sita’s upbringing had not been normal; there was not a single instance when she had been scoffed or frowned upon. Urmila had suffered all of that and taken it with a brave smile on a trembling chin. Sita had been hailed as Janaki, Janak’s daughter, when it was Urmila who was his daughter and the sole proprietor of that name. Sita was Maithili, the princess of Mithila when it was Urmila who should have been crowned with that title. But Urmila was never resentful about all the favours showered upon Sita when at the same time, she was deprived of them. She treated Sita ‘normally’ like any other sister would. Praise was only reserved for Sita, though it was invariably Urmila who picked up the Vedic verses more quickly than her sisters. But not like Sita was proud of this or ever boasted about it. She, at the same time felt obligated to her, a burden which even she silently carried and could never shrug off. Urmila had always been the veritable older sister all through their growing years-strong, fiercely protective like a tigress, shielding Sita from everything, guiding her, helping her, consoling her.
Soon they all grew up and the time had come for Sita to get married. Ram, accompanied with Lakshman, had come to Mithila as a suitor for Sita’s Swayamvar where the challenge was to lift and string the famous ShivDhanush. And as we all know, Ram was successful in proving his physical prowess and winning Sita’s hand. While Sita knew that Ram was the one for her, Urmila got attracted to Lakshman at their first very sight. She found something cognate, a certain affinity as soon as she saw Lakshman and they were actually similar in many ways. She too realised that she desired for Lakshman as her companion. But her love was not unrequited. Lakshman had developed similar feelings for her. He was completely enchanted by her, just as her name suggests, Urmila- ‘the enchantress’. He loved her for her integrity, her knowledge, her passion for life and learning. In fact he was mesmerized by her to the point where he thought that he did not deserve her, and as I read, some of you might actually feel the same. But he had warned her before marrying saying that he cannot promise her happiness as he was too devoted to his brother, that he was servile to him. He doubted if he was worthy of her love and if he can give his whole to her. In spite of all these warnings, Urmila replied by telling him that, she did not want his surrender. She assured him that she would never come between his loyalty to his beloved brother and his family and she followed it. Eventually all the four sisters of Mithila got married to the four brothers of Ayodhya and everything seemed to be lovely for the initial two months.
Lakshman was always supportive of Urmila and showered her with love. Soon, as the myth tells us, Kaikeyi, King Dashrath’s second and his most beloved wife had put up a condition that Ram had to be exiled to the Dandakarna forest for fourteen years and her son was to be made the kind of Ayodhya as she was granted the two boons. Lakshman, without even giving a thought about Urmila, insisted Ram to take him along with him and in spite of Ram’s denial, he decided to go with him, so did Sita. Urmila was devasted. Not only she was going to be separated from the soulmate from her childhood, her sister but also that she would be parted for fourteen long, treacherous years from the man she loved the most. They had just started their married life. She even pleaded with Lakshman to take her along with them, but Lakshman had firmly refused saying that she would act as a distraction and that he would not be able to devote himself completely and protect his brother and his wife properly. Even though Urmila knew that Ram would be prioritised over her, she felt hurt that her husband did not even consider her or ask her before taking the decision. This was her fate, to be second. Second to everything from her childhood itself. Yet she took all of this in a positive way and supported her husband in his decision.
Lakshman made her believe that it was their love for each other that will keep them goingand that it was destined for him to go. It was surely devastating and painful for Ram, Sita and Lakshman to live in a forest like Dandakarna for fourteen years but even so, Urmila’s exile in the palace was way harder than theirs in the forest, an exile from attachment. All of us know how about Ram’s exile in the forest but hardly any of us know what happened in the palace at the very same time. Just two months after they left for their exile in the forest, King Dashrath passed away. It is said that the whole family had gone to the forest to convince Ram to come back to the palace but Ram denied as he had given his word to his father. Bharat, Ram’s third brother also took a vow that as long as Ram would be in the forest, he too, shall do his penance in Nandigram. Hearing this was like a scream for Urmila as she knew that her sister, Mandavi, who was married to Bharat would have to go through the same fate as hers.
At that point of time, in front of all the people she furiously argued that everyone talks about and follows the dharma of the father and the sons, of the king and the prince, of the Brahmin and the Kshatriya, even of the wife for her husband but she questioned the dharma of the husband for his wife, the dharma of the son for his mother. Was there no dharma for the sons and the husbands? Was it always about the father, sons and brothers? She stood up as woman when the family tradition there was to be silent when someone screams for justice. Her questions were nothing but valid but nobody could answer them. She ended up all by saying that they may be the best of princes, the perfect sons, the ideal brothers, probably the ideal king too, but never the good husband. Unfortunately, questioning all this was futile at that time as the woman was always unheard and her opinions hardly mattered. Bharat left for his penance anyway. They all got back home feeling rejected yet Urmila did not take their exile negatively.
She started working constructively by learning the Vedas and gaining knowledge. She always loved painting so she started making a painting of her wedding day. She also took up the responsibility to mend things between the queens in the palace. She showed everyone the bright side of the painful path and took immense care of everyone. She introduced the concept of family dinners so that everyone, at least once in a day, talks to each other and shares what they feel. Standing up like a pillar she held the palace together. It was she who looked after all the members in the family, keeping the family together and saving it from a living hell. She made the palace a better place to stay, making it home one wants to return to every single day; blessing it with her patient love, her indomitable spirit and her everlasting hope for peace.
Mandavi and Urmila were going through the same fate, living in the same wretchedness. Both of them had to stay apart from their husbands for such a long time but the same life was taken in two different ways by both of them. Mandavi had taken it bitterly and had started hating her husband for his decision when at the same time, Urmila’s love for Lakshman had only increased and she believed that it was also her husband’s love for her that kept her going. That she waited for the day for him to return. She lived on his memories. She guided Mandavi and told her to follow her interests. That we can only see the light when it is dark but if we are dark within, we can only see darkness around us. She told her to follow that light.
The fourth and the youngest brother, Shatrughna who was left in the palace had to go to various places for handling political affairs at times. Having no king, it was easy for any outsider to attack and take over Ayodhya as it was at its most vulnerable position. Urmila, who was well versed in politics took up the position and looked after state administration, giving orders which were followed too.
As she completed her painting, the nightmare was coming to an end. They were finally returning. Standing on the same steps where she had bid him adieu, she again held in her hands a gold tray for the aarti to welcome him home, her eyes steady. Lakshman looked at her and murmured that he had lived for her and that it was she who got him back home. The person who never got the love she actually deserved yet being never resentful about it; the peacemaker, patching up quarrels, diffusing tempers, ironing out the differences; who was entitled to everything but got nothing, yet never got malicious, braving it all her life, independently; never wasting tears of self-indulgent sorrow but letting it all out so beautifully through her fertile mind and generous heart, Urmila, is indeed the forgotten heroine of the Ramayana.
- Sanika Gad
Comments
Post a Comment